An Average Asian: Will wait at a yield sign until there is no view of any oncoming vehicles for at least three miles.
An average Asian: Will go. Other vehicles have brakes for a reason.
Among the many factors that separate the Asians from the the non-Asians, perhaps none is as prominent as driving behavior. To break out of the Average Asian mold, it’s important to take on a more pointlessly aggressive approach towards operating your motor vehicle. However, simply becoming an average Asian driver is dangerous. It’s important to begin with some initial steps:
1) Real average Asians let their emotions take over when they drive. Try and practice expressing emotions; if this is difficult, try and imagine a time of great distress in your life to antagonize and place you in the right mindset. Examples may include failing to win parent’s respect, getting a 97 on a second grade spelling test, or possessing vision which did not necessitate corrective glasses, dooming one to a lifetime of an unobstructed visage.
2) Buy a cell phone and get at least one talkative friend (preferably white). Bonus points for finding a friend who is undergoing issues in their life and just “need a buddy” to talk it out with. The combination of multitasking driving, holding a cell phone, and sighing sympathetically will drive any individual into frustrated rage.
3) Move to Los Angeles.
Average Asians have already masterfully developed the skills required for substandard driving, and following the above criteria will give a solid background for the Average Asian ready to get out of the right lane and into the fastlane.
And don’t get into accidents. Average Asians are supposed to be aggressive drivers, which is harder without a ‘92 Honda Accord.
